We Can Do Better

Have you ever been at a funeral and wondered if the person giving the eulogy actually knew the person who died?

I have, and it makes me want to do better.

I've been to some Celebrations of Life where the tributes were fantastic. My favourite was done by two friends of the deceased, who ended with a list of 10 Things You Might Not Have Known about him. Good tributes make me laugh, usually make me weepy, and always help me remember.

I've spoken to clergy who have to essentially say nice things about a member of the flock they barely knew (for a variety of reasons; I'm not passing judgement here on either party). It's hard, so they rely on a couple of templates they can vary slightly to fit the circumstances.

Tributes given by friends or family tend to be more personal, but they aren't always well done. Figuring out everything you want to say about a loved one is hard! We make it harder by expecting that it should be done within tight timelines and when everyone involved is grieving.

No wonder we don't usually do it well.

And what about obituaries or funeral announcements, published in newspapers or online? We are so much more than a list of the places we've been and the people we leave behind.

We can do better. I know we can.